HOSPITAL JUST VISITING

My Daughter got to cast her and her Mother holding hands she did it using a kit but what a great memento and keepsake I is something she will always keep and the way she cast  it turned out really good , I wish I had one holding my mothers hand I be very happy.

Helen went to Pinderfield's hospital for her follow up mammogram she also had a biopsy which she did not enjoy and it left her bloody and in quite a lot of discomfort and pain , it will be two weeks before we get the results back to say she is in the clear .
I have today off no working 6-2 until Monday we have some nice  pieces of steak and baked jacket potatoes for tea.

Bidding on some Marshall headphones on eBay I have been outbidded the current bid is £25 they are wireless bluetooth these are pre owned sounds so  much posher than second hand new they are costing around the £65 mark how high do I go just over nine hours left to bid.

GOING ON'S

Took the car in for its first service had to be there at half eight had about three hours sleep there was no issues all ok it  had a oil and filter change , they gave me a loan car a Skoda Citigo  was ok did not like the rear view mirror it made what you see way much closer bad idea it had very little acceleration in top gear got to admit I would not swap and was happy to get my car back.

 Bought a Seven foot Christmas tree for the van it is pre -lit with 300 led bulbs , with sprayed on decorative snow , pine cones ,and berries it has 930 tips it is decorated with pink .white and clear glass baubles and ornaments we usually put the tree up the first weekend in December we are well early this year .
We also change the room back to how it was set out previously which looks better the tree is in the bay window we bought a white star for the top we did see some hand made fairies but at sixty pounds a bit more than we wanted to spend  .

Bought a portable DVD player for my Grandson its a Polaroid I was going to get one of Ebay but decided to physically buy one if it is faulty a lot easier to return .

I have a long weekend Friday I go back with Helen for her re screening of her breast at our local hospital and of course she is not happy she is also worried her  appointment is half past eight hence no work Friday night Saturday morning hopefully all will be fine .

My ex wife is waiting for a wheel chair to help her get around , its not looking good for her I don't know how she is coping knowing she has only months left . I try to imagine if I had the same news how I react or how brave would I be totally not sure how I would cope I look at it like being on death row but its worse because its cancer and cancer is not nice ,

I know I would be pissed off big time with all the things I haven't done yet , they say you never regret the things you have done its the things we have not done or can no longer do or  don't have the time to do  . Some of it is silly things like next years films we see trailers months in advance but  knowing you wont get to watch them , new albums from your favourite artists that will be coming out but you will never get to hear them  , how does Game of Thrones end ,  new books you wont be around to read  , and no more summer barbecues or winter snows needless to say  the list is endless .To say I would be pissed is not really hitting the mark being pissed off I guess would not even be close .

To top it all my loving and  mature son has thrown his last teddy out of the cot big time , why you ask   one reason money because I would not be a guarantor or guarantee for a loan of a £1000 , paid back over three years at fifty pounds a month ,  he has never held a job for three years since he has been working  needless to say  I said NO , so I am once again blocked off Face book messenger and calling him , I have been told that he then asked his mother suffering her battle with cancer how much money  she would be leaving him in her will once she dies , I tell you now how much you will be getting from me  when I die a BIG FAT ZERO , 100% OF NOTHING .

PAINTED

Dusted off the slow cooker bought some stew steak , swede , onions , mushrooms and carrots  all from the local farm shop

.We was going over to my daughters house in Kippax and the cooker full of freshly made stew was going to feed us all . I also made eight dumplings using some beef suet they was  no where near as good as my mums but they turned out ok .

Helen also mixed up some batter and  did nine pancakes in the frying pan , it was loaded in to an Ikea bag with the handles tied and transported in the boot of my car to my daughters home .

SUNDAY - Went over to Helen's parents house to paint the living rooms wall and corridor the fire place wall is a royal blue the rest of the walls are white along with the all  cornice .
They cooked us a Sunday dinner of braised steak Yorkshire pudding potatoes and swede and carrot mash .W will be going back next Sunday to give some walls a   second and third coat we are also doing the kitchen walls and cornice white .

UNJUST

It rained most of the day yesterday and we are having rain whilst I write this .I have just  made an extra large coffee and I am contemplating making a double size bowl of porridge.
 My ex wife cancer as now spread to her stomach and pancreas after all her bravery and treatment  the outcome for her  is now dire .

I feel for anyone who is suffering or a loved one that  is suffering from this dreadful indiscriminating disease.
There is nothing that can be done and of course there is never going to be enough time left which is so sad and unjust .
My thoughts and prays  go out to all , Graham her husband , to my Daughter who as been an angel and my son  who could have done more and have a better attitude going out partying every weekend is unacceptable and asking her inappropriate questions even more so  .

5 W'S

SUNDAY - Went to B&M again since Helen has been watching the following https://www.YouTube.com/channel/UCw_cgQw94ppdIjwHFE0aQ7g/videos B&M has been elevated in her ranking this time it was the Dewsbury store and not the one in Wakefield.

Helen had another reading tonight after she finished I cooked the curries and rice for tea I tried the coconut rice was ok couldn't really taste the difference .

Sent my daughter loads of photos from years past must have been well over three hundred all via face book messenger had to do them in batches of ten or less so the would not be too large , too large and they won't send .

I have told her toe get her Mother to write down a brief history of her life  WHO .WHAT ,WHY, WHEN and WHERE ,  also to do a pod cast and a vlog so she has something to hear and see something just for her to play or read once she is not with her anymore and of course to spend as much time possible with her Mam . I don't know what else to tell her I can't say it'll be ok because it wont be .

TIME TOGETHER

SATURDAY - Took Helen to her parent's park home at Acaster Malbis roughly 40 miles away from our home , from there I drove over to my son's home another 16 miles .Then on  to Manchester roughly another 85 miles away I got  us there just before one in the afternoon the weather was sunny and warm  .

My son was having his teeth  braces off his teeth then they where getting cleaned he also had two ceramic fillings  completed  his treatment took two hours .

I went for a short walk we was on a high street there was a Gregg's I bought a steak and cheese baked roll and a iced doughnut I had not eaten all day .

 Helen had three readings to do that night starting at six in the evening it was about three in the afternoon when we headed back .

He was happy with his treatment he was pleased to have his braces off he had brought  his iPod classic along and was playing his favourite songs through the cars stereo system it was a good drive out .

No doubt he will remember this day for years to come ,  it's all about making memories and spending time together there is even good  times in the  mundane stuff that needs to be done at the en do the day the main thing is  its time spent together. 

SAD NEWS

Bt sent out a new smart hub which was suppose to for tout my Internet woes , set it up change all the passwords on both Mac books two iPads to tablets and two phones , then I did the Fire stick tv x 2 and last but not least the Amazon Echo which is always a pain .

Then I did a speed test using Bt nothing has improved guess who I called they sending out another engineer this is the 3rd time fingers crossed .
The engineer came he actually came in to our home which surprised me he was here for about twenty minutes he found the fault the micro filter was wired incorrectly we are now hitting 35 mbps which we have never had before hopefully it will remain constant .

THURSDAY - Broad band speed holding its own constant 35 mbps which is good .

Sad news my ex wife as been diagnosed with brain cancer after beating lung cancer  during the summer both our children are sad and upset  beyond words , it is not something I wish on anyone it is a dreadful and unforgiven disease  and I pray and hope she proves the doctors wrong and wins her battle .

FRIDAY - Was up at eight a.m took the dog out we was at Pinderfields hospital for ten Helen had a mammogram booked it was a three hour appointment it was half past one when we got to B&M by the time I got us home it was just before three I go to work at five .
cooked us a roast chicken dinner with three green vegetables sprouts peas and broccoli with roast potatoes and Yorkshire puddings .By the time it was cooked and eaten it was time to set off for work roll on the weekend.

RAINY MONDAYS

Another Friday which means thank fcuk for the weekend , for some reason this week as dragged big style .
Took Helen for her blood test and for her breathing test she also got some nicotine patches and inhaler to hopefully help her stop and quit smoking so fingers crossed .
Got to bed just after three had a kebab .

SATURDAY - We cooked a beef chili had it with rice and sweet potatoes chips and garlic bread was quite hot , well hotter than what we usually do and as always there was plenty left over .

SUNDAY  - Took Helen for her P.I.P meeting at one o clock will not find out if she can claim until later .
My sister Anne came for Sunday dinner we had roast pork mashed carrot and swede with roasted sweet potatoes and mash and Yorkshire puddings .Followed by apple and blackcurrant pie with custard .

MONDAY - Just vacuumed the leaves up and washed the windows before it rained never mind cooked breakfast and work at six my eighth week doing six till two .

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6NPJdNiHTM

ANNIVERSARY SINCE 2011

MONDAY - Our engagement anniversary is today  November the 5th which is also  bonfire night There well be fireworks tonight although it will be two  thirty a.m before I get anywhere to my bed .As well as fire works we will have pork pies and mushy peas with mint sauce  but I do without the peas have never liked them and I am not too fused about the mint sauce either , totally takes the taste out of the food in my opinion all you taste is mint might as well brush your teeth before and half way through your meal , anyway each to their own .

Helen's son took us to Canon Hall for a full English breakfast , he had eggs benedictine after we had finished eating I bought Helen a Joules tweed jacket. She as always wanted one for the last few years since we lived in Holmfirth I also got her a west  highland terrier key ring .

BUSY SUNDAY

My fibre broadband is running at half speed  just like the good old days .When  we switched over to a fibre connection it started off really good but over the weeks as  dwindled down to just 50% speed of what we was originally getting .

Phoned Bt speaking to an advisor half way through got cut off , so I  phoned back then was told the advisor left a note on my account saying that I had hung up what a joke .
Anyway an engineer came out and was working for a good two hours hopefully be three days before we see any improvement .

The new land line connection and new socket for an Ethernet cable is all done got to say they did a really good job very tidy and neat , even left me his mastic gun did ring them up so far he has not bothered to collect it .

SUNDAY - Went to Sainsbury's bought two 2019 diary for Helen plus a nice new pen and a gold looking pen , got to be biro she don't do gel , really I love gel pens apart from blue gel got to be black .
Also bought Dawn French "This is not a Diary " book just come out , I bought another remembrance lap badge this one is silver in the shape of an infantry man you can just make out the red poppy and green leaf.

Helen was working on the phones doing her psychic readings after she had finished at around half twelve her son Liam turned up ,he stayed the night .

SAD TIMES

MONDAY -No work today laid the second piece of linoleum in Helen's outbuilding used double sided carpet tape to fix it in place only needed a 800 cm piece to finish the floor .
Wired another L.E.D outside light , so when Helen is working the outside id flood lighted and she can see out at night when it is dark.

TUESDAY - Ordered another cordless phone from Bt it arrives on Thursday hopeful this will suite Helen's needs .

Carved my pumpkin head it is outside on the patio table at the side of Helen's I think mine is the better of the two Helen's don't even scare the cats away .

Back at work tomorrow at least it will be a short week three days till the weekend is nice be dark driving to work and dark driving home .

WEDNESDAY - Helen's uncle Ken's funeral at the grave yard and church where we use to live .The Church is shut down for repairs so the service was done at the grave side they lowed the coffin into the ground said a few prayers and a couple of speeches by the resident vicar or priest then we was throwing flowers and dirt on to the coffin . The coffin looked like it would only take  a few months to rot down of once the earth has been put back into the grave it was a good six feet down if not more .

To think of a person being placed  in a box and being put in the ground for the next hundred years does not seem right to me thank god for cremation.